Almost everyone I followed has locked their diaries...i suppose i should move on too. I have alot happening now that i was accepted into a masters degree program, and don't have the support i need in my life to do all of this.
I am quickly re-realizing that too often able-bodied people dont really often try to care or understand. And that it makes my life really a lot harder.
I feel overwhelmed, really. I never feel like I belong or matter or am doing anything of any value. I am tired of constantly fighting for services, and dealing with neverending bureaucracy.
I already feel tired of it all.
I can't get anything done lately because it keeps storming.
We got a very awful winter storm last week, it dropped to 20 degrees for 2 days and snowed 8 in hes. We think it killed an entire nest of unhatched finches. One of the eggs was shoved out of the nest, and in the cracked off shell, I could see a tiny pink hardened corpse with tiny brown spots.
The winter weather also killed a beautiful piwdery blue butterfly with spots.
I have a bunch of plants that somehow survived the winter storm, that i now have had to rescue from the hail and wind.
But now that it isn't snowing there are hundreds of juvenile lady bugs.
I had been keeping in touch with a lady who is moving here, but she was hired for a fulltime position and i suspect will disappear as everyone does. So much for having a friend.
It is hard only having two people in the entire world that care enough to try to help. And my mom is disabled and elderly so she cannot turn much.
Anyway, i should sleep
~e