lillian m. blakey moon_window




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Sunlight on Earth

� Copyright 2006-2012
Friday, Aug. 04, 2006 - 1:25 am

=*=



"You are educated. Your certification is in your degree. You may think of it as the ticket to the good life. Let me ask you to think of an alternative. Think of it as your ticket to change the world." ~ Tom Brokaw

Yesterday was as busy a day as I've had in quite a while. And with my recent lack of adequate sleep, a totally exhausting day as well. The other night I fell asleep at around 4:30 and woke up, like clockwork, 5 hours later at 9:05. Sadly, despite all of my activity yesterday, I didn't do much better last night either. I was asleep by 3am, but awake at 8:30. I eventually fell back asleep, only to be woken up again at 10 by the yard maintainance crew sloppily mowing the sparse tufts of grass. Something is definitely going on in my subconscious. I'm starting to think I know what it is too.

Yesterday my mom and I walked around the entire college campus at least four times. I, in my goddessy platforms. Everyone at the college was yawning, students and staff alike. Everyone was tired. Most of us students were thoroughly confused, and simply winging whatever it was we were doing. Myself included. After the day was done, I felt like I'd run a marathon. But I did everything I needed to do in less than three hours, not six.

In that time I filled out a declaration of major, I'm (for now) getting an AA transfer degree in general studies (till they get a film/acting/theatre/TV degree). I saw a very sweet advisor to get my CPE results and class placement, got a complement on my blue nailpolish, submitted my financial aid forms, turned in my transcript request form, got hit on by the dude in the library as I filled out my library request form, checked out my classes which will be in the fitness center, got two free books, English brush up, and a writing reference book. Uh�oh! Measured my locker, and a lot more.

The advisor told me they placed me a class higher than I thought I'd be in, so instead of English 108, I'm in the final class, English 109, which is the equivalent of roughly 12th grade English. After this it's college level English. And, after I pass English 109 I can take most of the classes at the college, including Foreign Language, Astronomy, Physics, and�AND the various Film Studies classes. That deserves a 'squee!'

So, last night I told Josh and W, that I'd be taking English 108 just the same, but after sleeping (somewhat) I'm thinking of going for English 109 instead. It'll be a challenge, but it's a review class, and still goes through grammar, punctuation, sentence and paragraph structure, essay writing, and then goes further into writing and documentation of research papers. I'll have to write 6 essays and a 1000 word documented research paper, plus get them read aloud in class AND we'll have to critique eachothers work�ugh. I don't like that last part at all, but I'm sure I'll survive.

After she told me my placement, I wore a permanent smile and was off to the financial aid office fifteen feet away. I handed in my paperwork, and the woman there told me that once I submit my 2005 benefits report from SSI, and once my transcripts get submitted, I'll be all ready to go. She sent me back to enrollment to declare a major, which is where I was complemented with a vibrant "I love your nailpolish, its so beautiful!" as the lady handed me my forms to fill out. I laughed at the idea of my quirky insane love of blue nailpolish actually being admired, as I said thank you. After that I walked back to financial aid, and handed that form in. That was all easier than I thought it would be.

Then I measured my locker. It's a spacious, 14.5 inches wide, x 13.5 inches deep, and about two feet high. Now I can find "stuff" for it. When I opened it, a sun-smiley faced note saying "have a nice summer" was lying at the bottom. That's how long it's been since I opened my locker.

We then walked out to the fitness center. The moment the sliding doors opened, that wonderful dampness, and chlorine scent of the pool, grabbed at me. The reflection of the crystal blue water on the glass windows made me want to jump in. The security guard was watching us, as we walked up the rather extensive double flight of stairs. Because of the number of suicidal thoughts I was getting in my head, I jokingly told my mom that if I was in the mood for a dramatic moment, I could simply throw myself down them. Yeah, she actually laughed.

When you get upstairs, there's an opening down to the ground floor. The actual floor below is at least 15 down, if not further. When I saw it I felt this fear that if I got close to it, I couldn't stop myself from jumping. So I avoided going too close to the railing.

There were at least 7 people, in their mid to late teens, sleeping all over each other on the ?sofas. They were all lying so adorably, that they all looked more like cats than people. My future classes were just down the hall.

As it turns out the afternoon and night classes schedule *is* feasable. The classes are far from the main building, but not too far to walk, and at night it will be well lit. There's a nice shortcut we found (after walking the terribly long way, in the unbearably hot sun, of course) that cuts through the IT department. I do have to cross the street, more of a driveway really, but it'll be good to experiment to see if I can, out of necessity, cross it. My future classes overlook the pool. A wonderfully big, olympic size, deep aquamarine-blue pool, with that wonderful, clean, pool smell. And there are comfy seats and large tables right beside my classrooms. I'm thinking I'm going to miss the pool view once the semester is over. I found it rather calming to watch the kids swimming, and leaping into it. It's very nice. :-) And I'll have a whole hour to get lost in imagining myself swimming in it inbetween classes. The fish that I am�

The one slight problem, is that there aren't any windows in my classroom. I'm not sure if I'll totally freak out in there or not, if there ends up being too many people, more than say, 10. I might have to request that the door be left open, if I do panic. But there were two gigantic blackboards and at least 25 chairs behind the four rows of tables.

After taking the elevator back down, and finding the shortcut that leads from the main building to the fitness center, we made it back to the testing center, which was locked when I arrived. But the chief examiner saw me and kindly came out and accepted my transcript request form in person. I told her what the adviser had told me, that my math scores would not show for the CPE, so I didn't know what math class I'd be in. She told me she'd look into it as soon as the computers were back up. And she told me once she got the GED test results in, she'd send my transcripts over to the records office in person so it wouldn't take so long, it's just down the other hall for god's sakes.

After that, I went to the library�where a guy, at least mid-twenties, flirted at me. I wasn't in a flirty mood at all, in fact my brain rejected talking to him. Unlike with W, I went totally blank as to what to say in response. I was filling out my form, and he surmized very quickly that I'm a new student. He tried to find out what classes I'd be in�no I didn't tell him much. Anyway, he told me a bit about himself, and I heard in my head "wow, you're nothing like W are you" (this was not good as I do like W, justified or not) and I struggled with what to say back. He told me he went to college backwards, and now to graduate, is taking all of his English and Math classes. He needed to see a photo ID, and yes I know it's school policy, so I had to show him my ID. I know he saw the date of birth, because his eyes got really big as he looked back up at me. Then he told me his name and the library policies, and I smiled. All I could say was a weird, nervous "thank you." Anyway�I can check out books at the library at school now. Yay�I'm hoping for my sake, he was just "being friendly." And isn't envisioning himself as a future stalker. To his benefit, I will say that he did pronounce my name correctly, on the first try. However, the tone with which he correctly pronounced my name, is another story�

After that, we left, and I was tired, mostly of having to talk to people. We had to wait 50 minutes for the cab to show. In that time a leaf/treehopper befriended me. It was tiny and adorable, and seemed to like my company. I saw a wonderfully detailed baby spider, no more than 1/8 inch (4mm) entirely black and white in almost native designs. When he saw me he tried to hide beneath a small twig that had fallen from one of the trees. But it made it easier to see him up close once I grabbed hold of the twig. And I found an absolutely gorgeous striped seed,black and brown, I kept it to try to sprout it. I watched a guy, dressed all in white, get into an all white car. Yes, we have a Veronica of the male species here in SF. I got to overhear a conversation of two guys, one said to the other: "I can't believe you didn't pass this semester, even my drunk ass passed." The cab came, and I went home at felt exhausted the rest of the day.

And to end this on a relieved, happy, note...I received a phone call from the chief examiner today telling me that I passed both math and writing tests on the GED(!!) She couldn't give the scores over the phone, but I don't care, I passed. I graduated. I'm officially intelligent. And I (will) have a piece of paper to prove it.

I guess with this, if all goes well I'll be getting the Pell Grant this semester, maybe more. Yay. I'm coming up in the world. At least financially. Let's hope I survive taking two classes.

And�let's hope they spell my name right on my dipoloma.



=*= one day i'll fly away =*=

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