It's funny how my "friends" suddenly become not friends when I really need them. P is the only one who has seen me struggle this year, and try so hard to do so well in all ways, and he was kind to me today. He'd invited me to a very much looked forward to tea ceremony that took place this evening, but I'm so upset over everything with my classes, and the school's response, or lack of, that I haven't slept at all, and have had migraines for the past two days, so I let him know I couldn't go. And yes I feel terrible, but my head hurts so badly. My eyes are twitching, and I feel like I'm about to throw up.
Josh wasn't being very kind today when he told me I can "choose" to be upset over all of this or not. Feeling bad over being screwed over is not a choice when it took you 14 years to be able to step on school grounds, and another year to actually go. And now that you can go, the school does everything they can to keep you from equal access to participate in very challenging, but equally rewarding, off campus trips.
Don't get me started on W...he's letting me know what a useless piece of shit he thinks I am, he plays video games instead of talking to me. I can't believe I've trusted these people at all.
I just need kindness, and understanding.
you'd think people would understand by now, hell, even Marge Simpson has/had agoraphobia...