lillian m. blakey moon_window




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Sunlight on Earth

� Copyright 2006-2012
Monday, Nov. 17, 2008 - 10:40 pm

=*=



My life is going very good. I'm thoroughly happy. I have moments of doubt that scare me, but he relieves them as soon as he texts me, calls me, im's me, emails me, or I get to see him. He's been very good to me this past week. And we spent almost three days straight together, Thursday through Saturday. Minus about 10 hours. My mother is still clueless about what is going on�she talks of his as my "friend" and i'm like looking at her thinking 'you know, i'm physically an demotionally capable of much more than friendship with someone'.

We discovered that we are capable of doing homework together, which is really nice. Our relationship has gotten very intimate in many ways that I wasn't planning on but that feel right somehow. I'm really scared of getting pregnant and it's hard on me to feel that while trying to trust him. I don't know if I can handle birth control pills - my mom had horrible reactions, and i seem to have the same reactions to everything she does. But he is even more loving to me than I knew possible with someone. So, we have communicated some fears and things like that, and plan to make this the most healing and loving relationship possible. I think we both need that. We really love each other, and I'm trying to not let what W did fuck this up for me.

When I'm at his house, I can't help but read through his books. Healing, whloeness, spirituality, mysticism, Buddhism, yoga, mindfulness, psychology, etc. Quite a beautiful selection.

D invited me to his "grannies" house for Thanksgiving dinner. Being that she is the closest family he has here, I'm a bit thrilled to get to meet her. She is apparently quite spunky. I'll have my 2nd ever real Thanksgiving dinner!

I'm really hating my assignments for English. The essay #4 is about globalization and whether individuals were more empowered before or after. I want to argue points I can't with the rules given. And the research paper starts this week as well. I'm expanding my stance of escapism in America. Blah�I just need the semester to be over.

~e


=*= one day i'll fly away =*=

most recent entries:

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finally breaking down - Monday, Sept. 04, 2017