Up, unable to sleep...I keep feeling devastated. I keep feeling suicidal. I feel okay, then boom...fear and stress hit me. I keep getting sick if I eat. I've lost more weight. I'm scared...I have not received any letters from the SS@. I have no idea what is going on. I feel ill. And it is finals. And i need to get my english essay written today...as much as i can. Even if it isvan F paper, i will get 60% points to pass the class.

I just need to not get an F...

I don't know how much longer i can live like this, with this stress and no one knowing what to do...i'm just stuck in need of a lawyer, with no way to pay for one.

I've never gotten 3 incomplete grades before, and i've never been so impeded and undermined by the SS@... if this is how the government treats its own citizens, i'm not ok with this. The government shouldn't be in the business of undermining people from getting an education and trying and planning to go to work, but they are doing that to me...plus stealing my ss! money on top of it. I just feel desperate for it to end and my life to return to how i had been planning it out.

~e