Counting down to my birthday...
My bf has been less than affectionate the last two months. I'm not sure why...but since I've finished my semester he is wanting to eat out, constantly. I've gone with him twice...and both times was left feeling really sad about my circumstances and being stuck in the house by myself every day. My cohort member are messaging each other and clearly still interacting without including me...
I'm not going to lie, if I had no one to hurt, I would be killing myself at this point. I feel that discouraged about grad school and my life afterm everythung, and having nothing better happening, still.
I haven't found a placement to do my internship yet, and no nonprofits here seem interested in trying to become placements. Most I know are going outside of the city to do theirs...I don't have that option.
Without that, which is a required part of my degree, and in a required order, and with a 5 year limit start to finish, I am totally wasting my time and ruining my health for literally nothing...my blood pressure is so low that if I sit wit hour moving much, I go numb.
So, I'm not so happy about being another year older...just another year alone and stressed and ill...
~e