I want to drop grad school. All of me wants to drop.

My internship went to hell...I sit there doing nothing because the new director changed so much that I can't do anything, several quit the committees, (enough to not have quorems, and in turn cancelled meetings), and I hate my practice 2 class. In fact it's killing my little remaining happiness. The professor is a mess. I spend 3 days every week just making sense of her questions.

I'm at the point of accepting defeat.

I literally can't do this...

So I'm skipping my own disability committee, might be skipping class just to do the homework assignments.

My policy class professor literally gave us 4 sets of conflicting instructions...one in a powerpoint, two in the syllabus, and in-class instructions. I have a stack of papers an inch thick for a fucking 2 page paper.

I just need to get over my fears of failure, never being allowed ro marry, remaining in poverty, and knowing ill die alone in tbe world by suicide, and drop this stupidity already. I'm ill from it, from the stress of making sense of stupid nonsensical shitty instructions and textbooks... Every day. My textbooks are explaining the DSM IV...not DSM-V...

I'm up at 2 am...regretting that I still exist.

~e