I'm slowly piecing together why my thyroid symptoms are so severe.

1. I'm officially also iodine deficient, in addition to the B12, folate, iron, and D deficient...it's like my body has given up on trying to absorb nutrients from food.

2. My cholesterol glucose, homosysteine calcium, and parathyroid are all high.

3. Homosysteine blocks ability to utilize thyroid hormones.

4. Iodine blocks ability to make enough thyroid hormones.

5. High glucose feels super shitty too and makes you feel sleepy after you eat.

I got blood drawn to determine my phosphorous levels, as that will reveal what possibly is happening to my parathyroid.

All of this equals a very migraine laden, foggy, bloated, painfully swollen, antisocial easily fatigued and annoyed and nauseated me.

Im going to present this all to the Endo Dr in about a month. This has been extremely hard to have a self-driven crash course in thyroids and parathyroids both.

I was starting to feel like I was dying in some sincerely scary active final stages. I was considering going to ER.

My stomach had so much fluid in it that I felt uncomfortable drinking anything because my body hoarded it and bloated me up more, as I barely peed at all. It was compressing my lungs, my heart, my gallbladder, my fibroid tumor and making everything feel under pressure. So I became dehydrated over the last two weeks and decided I just need meds again.

I'm sad to say I don't yet feel the extreme elation or sense of normality I felt the first time around. In fact I kind of feel slightly more depressed, and I feel headachy and tired, but still much better physically. When I push on my tummy it goes in a little...last week I was distended and rock hard.

My jowls and double chin are lessening too. I do feel better, just not at all near feeling great. There's probably a good reason.

I'm also testing out taking the meds at a different time of day. Seeing if I take them in the morning will I sleep better. It's 1am and I'm not sleepy yet, so...that may be my answer. I just stay tired but unable to sleep.

It's going to be 23 degrees tonight. I'm not enjoying that, I'm freezing cold as it is.

Today I noticed my beautiful scented pink violet bloomed, and last week my pink geranium bloomed. Both in my windowsill. I have another violet, which is purple and white, that hasn't bloomed yet. The flowers are so tiny. This year I will think of names for them.

I bought a little bag of potting soil for seed starts. I need to feel better though to have that kind of energy.

I haven't even had energy to go get groceries for myself. I have to sit or lean against the shower. Everything feels exhausting. I'm tired. And I'm craving raspberries and blueberries and grapes.

And this week we are having crazy windstorms fueling large several fires. One of which was a controlled fire that got out of control...oops. we aren't at high risk of needing to evacuate unless it gets over the mountains.

I'll write of the happenings with my bf later. It's a very weird situation overall.

I just need to try to sleep.

~e