I have been forced to fight people for the past two weeks, straight, without one day off...

it started getting really bad on the 7th, when i got a call that the endo Dr I'd been waiting 9 months, for who i was forced to cancel in May, couldn't see me except by telehealth video...which i was fine with, except their billing department cancelled my appointment in May because they stated my insurance didn't allow telehealth for initial consultations. SO then a supervisor confirmed with billing that that was still true they were claiing it was not covered, and i was forced to cancel my appointment last week too...well two days later i go and find the covid rules and it says that video visits are allowed whether established or new...so I call my insurance, and they confirm that. So I call the clinic...they insist its not covered, again...to me and to the supervisor. the supervisor just scheduled me anyway, for a video visit because i'd been waiting long enough.

I filed with the state medicaid office but no one has gotten back to me. i scheduled my video visit from a cancellation, but honestly i'm expecting to get a bill for the visit because no one at the state medicaid office is helping me, and the billing department is insisting that its not covered.

The endo was okay, not great, but good enough so far. She was typing up my prior auth for the meds that are helping, but still hasn't submitted it to my insurance after 5 days.

She never said what she thought is causing this, so when I asked, she seemed kind of annoyed. She didn't really say anything, so I said is it from something serious or do you think my thyroid is just going...she said yes, but we will need follow ups for your thyroid and parathyroid. She never actually explained anything to me. and she said she is confused about the incident were my heart wouldn't stop racing and pounding harder and I almost passed out.

So I'm still anxious about waiting for the prior auth.

Then in between all of this last week, I discover and realize and learn that my town is in a serious federal law violation. I can't say much here, because I am about to have to deal with that very publicly in ways that are unsafe and uncomfortable in many ways. it's a dept of justice issue and its several issues that have been going on for 3 months now with no sign of it resolving. the issue I am having is that i have never done anything like this, I am still not stable physically, and i am not good with stress at all these days. This is against the entire top gov't administration of my town. This is really terrifying. In short my city is without any doubt in any way, fully violating the @d@ right now, in several ways, and it is on me to do something about it because no one else will.

Then today i realize my prescription for my anxiety meds is expired last month, so i go to schedule with my psychiatrist and am told since it is "almost" a year since i last saw her it is up to her if I am still a client or if I need to get a full evaluation again and that she can deny me as a client. A full evaluation will kill me at this point, they are 2 to 3 hours long, divulging every aspect of your life you can't perform. And they refused to let me schedule an appointment at all. The thing is she renewed my meds without me asking her to or having an appointment, in January, and if I schedule with her while I have a current prescription then they accuse me of drug seeking, so I have to wait to see her till they expire. we all have no idea why she did that and they can even see that she did that. It was likely illegal of her to do that.

on top of this the clinic where my endo is, can't work with me to get the tests done that my endo ordered on the same day. so I am having to not go to get them, because we cant afford to go back and back and back...they had promised me I'd get to do them the same day, which is why I said to do them there. but the nurse i talked with yesterday was incredibly rude and told me there was a very short deadline for one of the tests, and that I'd have to just to comply with their deadlines and go there multiple times. So I said well I cant do this at that clinic then...waiting for an opening for someone here means waiting several months to get a referral to a Dr here to get the tests. But that is what will need to happen.

I'm just feeling so unbelievably done with people and with medical care and people in high positions of power who can't do their jobs correctly.

I'm also feeling done with people altogether...it's not a good place to be, but it's where i am.

~e